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Bestiary

by KIRK'S DIK DIK

supported by
Daniel Neal
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Daniel Neal KIRK’S DIK DIK is a hot dopamine shot straight to the brain for those of us obsessed by biology, lo-fi experimental music, and remembrances of nights outside Leeds where a mad Souzaphone player serenaded puzzled Muni riders. Plus it rocks. Favorite track: The BLACK ROGUE.
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1.
Landlord Lamprey Landlord, lamprey one sucks your blood the other yo' pay He's livin high and isn't he the picture of ease while me and mine are livin on the government cheese We're on the government cheese We're on the government cheese We're on the government cheese We're on the government cheese, yeah! Landlord, lamprey one sucks your blood the other yo' pay Slave all month to pay your bills so he can live all cozy on the top of the hill He's on the top of the hill on the top of the hill on the top of the hill on the top of the hill, yeah! Landlord, lamprey one sucks your blood the other yo' pay He's livin high and isn't he the picture of ease while me and mine are livin on the government cheese We're on the government cheese We're on the government cheese We're on the government cheese We're on the government cheese, yeah! ...
2.
The Black Rogue In the valley of the Moyar Lived an elephant like this world has never known He was black and he was hairy He was peaceful till they shot him in his spine. Full of fury full of vengeance The elephant now charges towards the little town And his feet fell just like thunder With his trumpet blasting through the jungle trees! In the town... Bicycles and broken bodies lying all around Bicycles and broken bodies lying all around In the ruins of the village Heaps of limbs and lifeless bodies all around Back in Delhi great white hunter boards the train and promises to kill the rogue Great white hunter in the jungle tracks the black rogue though it almost runs him down And his feet fell just like thunder And his trumpet blasting through the jungle trees In the town... Bicycles and broken bodies lying all around Bicycles and broken bodies lying all around In the darkness of the jungle the elephant now re-a-lizes he must die Now the black rogue in the quick sand blasts his trumpet as he sinks to meet his doom Great white hunter in the shadows shoots the black rogue ending all his miseries And his shots rang out like thunder with his rifle blasting through the jungle trees In the town... Bicycles and broken bodies lying all around Bicycles and broken bodies lying all around.
3.
BONACON 04:22
Bonacon Some people betray you They'll seem so nice--then drag you down! You know some creatures will chase you... do not chase the bonacon! Some monsters will take you, They'll seize your throat with foaming jaws! You know some scoundrels will fake you! Do not chase the bonacon! I tell you this my son, Be sure the thing you're chasing is not a bonacon! Some things are worth pursuing Beneath the burning sun... Be sure the thing you're chasing is not a bonacon! Some creatures will maul you They'll tear your flesh with gleaming claws! You know some evil will call you, answer not the bonacon! Some villains will spite you, they'll lay in wait Then strike you down You know some brigands will fight you. Do not fight the bonacon. Get this in your mind The evil of the bonacon is what it leaves behind! When you see it fleeing Get this in your mind... The evil of the bonacon is what it leaves behind!
4.
Holly's Holothurian Dream Holl-y came from El Pas-o Went to school at U of O. Found her passion was the sea Loved marine biology Then one day along the shore upon the sandy ocean the floor A spineless creature called her name and Holly never was the same... Now she's dreaming holothurian dreams (when she's dreaming!) Thinking holothurian things (when she's thinking!) Singing holothurian things (when she's singing). Dreaming holothurian dreams (when she's sleeping) Something in it's symetry... It's ten-ta-cles, it's tube-like feet It''s perfect brainless neural ring made poor Holly want to sing Of Aquapharyngeal bulb and even polian vesicle! Of luminal epithelial cell and second mesothelial Now she's dreaming holothurian dreams (when she's dreaming!) Thinking holothurian things (when she's thinking!) Singing holothurian things (when she's singing). Dreaming holothurian dreams (when she's sleeping)
5.
CHAPALAMANIA 00:54
6.
HELLBENDER 03:40
HELLBENDER REIGN Beneath the stone In turbid stream, upon his throne Hellbender dreams. Of cleaner days and darker nights; of arthropod and hellgrammite. Etc. Seek not the sun Hellbender! Amphibian king beneath the stone! Seek not the sun salamander! In Satan's fire you walk alone Hellbender eye reflects the moon. Hellbender's time is coming soon! Seek not the sun Is our refrain. Thy will be done! Hellbender reign! Etc. Seek not the sun Hellbender! Amphibian king beneath the stone! Seek not the sun, salamander! In Satan's fire you walk alone Seek not the sun, hellbender! Will you survive the human race? Who is to blame, Polluter? Hellbender's plight... Is your disgrace! Etc.
7.
I Want My Thylacine I want my thylacine I want my thylacine I want my thylacine But he ain't comin' back No he ain't coming back I want my dodo bird I want my dodo bird I want my dodo bird But she will never return No she'll never return. Tell me, who is next in line? Who is next in line? Who is next in line? Is it you and me? (Etc) I want my thylacine I want my thylacine I want my thylacine But he ain't comin' back No he ain't coming back I want my dodo bird I want my dodo bird I want my dodo bird But she will never return No she'll never return. Tell me, who is next in line? Is it you and me? Who is next in line? Is it you and me? Who is next in line? Is it you and me? Is it you and me? (Etc)
8.
Behold The Tardigrade Behold! Behold! The ancient life form in the vacuum of space! Behold! The future master... of the human race! This is the song of the mighty water bear! From the distant deeps unto the skies! Where have you been mighty little tardigrade? Will you conquer this whole galaxy? Behold! Behold! The ancient life form... in volcano-flame Behold! The awesome power... of the tardigrade! This is the song of the mighty water bear! From the distant deeps unto the skies! Where have you been ugly little tardigrade? Will you conquer this whole galaxy? Behold! Behold the slaving bipede... in the fields of moss! Behold this future vision... of the future boss! This is the song of the mighty water bear! From the distant deeps unto the skies! Where have you been ugly little tardigrade? Will you conquer this whole galaxy? Behold!
9.
JORMANGANDR! When the ancient serpent wakes you In your darkest dreams! When the Jormangandr takes you do not fight and scream! Sacrifice on bended knees to keep the snake at bay! Hope to sway those ancient forces on your judgement day! JORMANGANDR! Seize the hammer fight the dragon though you shall not win Raise the flagon to the heroes Now begin again. Oroboro! Jormangandr! Die and recreate. Oroboro ancient cycle! feed the gods you've made. JORMANGANDR!
10.
Bad Russian..................................... Approx. Eng. Translation Ayda prigniem.................................. Hey lets jump! Ayda prigniem ................................. Hey lets jump! Niestrashna-a-a--anna stena........... The wall she's not fearsome pere prigniem ................................... Over leap! pere prigniem.................................... Over leap! Niestrashna-a-a--anna stena ........... The wall she's not fearsome Rahzorvyoom mee... mal chish-ku.... We will tear apart the little man Rahzorvyoom mee... glow oat ku...... We will tear apart the throat Ayda da ayda.................................... Oh yeah! Ayda da ayda.................................... Oh yeah! Rahzorvyoom mee... glow oat ku!..... We will tear apart the throat! Ayda da ayda..................................... Oh yeah! Ayda da ayda..................................... Oh yeah! Zhiznee pesnyu mih poyom!.............. This song to life we sing! Ayda prigniem..................................... Hey lets jump! Ayda prigniem..................................... Hey let's jump! Tigritsa ee tsaritza.............................. Tigress and princess Ayda prigniem.................................... Let us jump Pere prigniem..................................... Over jump Niastrashna-a-a--anna stenna........... The wall she's not fearsome Ekh Tatiana Tigritsa!.......................... Hey Tatiana, Tigress! Tigritsa ee tsaritsa!............................ Tigress and queen! Ayda da ayda.................................... Oh Yeah! Ayda da ayda.................................... Oh Yeah! Doroga svoboda............................... Freedom road! Ayda prigniem................................... Hey lets jump! Ayda prigniem................................... Hey lets jump! Pesnyu kro-o-vee mih poyom........... This song of blood we sing! Ayda prigniem.................................... Let us jump Pere prigniem..................................... Over jump Zhiznee Pesnyu mih poyom!.............. This song to life we sing! Ay Tatiana!.......................................... Hey Tatiana! Tee Tzarina!......................................... Hey you queen! Ayda prigniem................................... Let us jump! Pere prigniem.................................... Overleap! Na svobo-o-du-u mih-i-dyom........... As we walk to freedom Ayda prigniem.................................... Let us jump! Pere prigniem.................................... Over leap! Ayda prigniem!................................... Let us jump!
11.
JIMMYROCHA 04:00
God made elephant big and stout Wasn't satisfied till he gave him great big snout Gave him a snout that was as long as a rail Wasn't satisfied till he gave him a great long tail Gave him a tail that was to fan them flies Wasn't' satisfied till he gave him some great big um eyes Gave him some eyes that was too raggedy sad, Wasn't satisfied till he gave him a big fat ass. He gave him an ass, the ass made him sick, wasn't satisfied till eh gave him a big dik dik. Gave him a dik dik and the dik dik made him sick, the dik dik made him well, you know about that! He was a fuckin! Yodel odel odel odel ay Jimmy Rogers. If you wanna dance you better hold your trousers! All you pretty lady better grab your blouses! Yodel odel odel odel ay Jimmy Rogers! Yodel odel odel odel ay Jimmy Rogers. If you wanna dance you better hold your trousers! All you pretty lady better grab your blouses! Yodel odel odel odel ay Jimmy Rogers! God made elephant big and stout Wasn't satisfied till he gave him great big snout Gave him a snout that was as long as a rail Wasn't satisfied till he gave him a great long tail Gave him a tail that was to fan them flies Wasn't' satisfied till he gave him some great big um eyes Gave him some eyes that was too raggedy sad, Wasn't satisfied till he gave him a big fat ass. He gave him an ass, the ass made him sick, wasn't satisfied till eh gave him a big dik dik. Gave him a dik dik and the dik dik made him sick, the dik dik made him well, you know about that! He was a fuckin! Eddie One String was a one string man. Played his one string with a steady hand. All you women stand in line Shake your little hind parts like I shake mind. Shake it up Shake it down Shake it all around the town. Shake it baby Shake it down! Shake it baby! Shake it all around!
12.
In the age of the ice worm Under the mountain I was the bastard Son of the king My mother was banished we knew starvation While all my brothers knew gluttony. But then the great war came my brothers were slaughtered The king on his death bed called out my name. Wingless dove Wingless dove Wingless dove Wingless dove As he lay dying I kneeled down beside him These were his words I'll make them quite plain: “Son, I am dying You must avenge me That is your duty To father and king.” “When my assassin stabbed me with his blade Tattooed on his wrist was A dove with no wings!” Wingless dove Wingless dove Wingless dove Wingless dove I promised to bring him this tatooed assassin, if only he would restore mother's name This he agreed to And made it official, and stamped it in gold: “decree of the king” Then as he choked on the poison I fed him I showed him my tatoo... A dove with no wings! Wingless dove Wingless dove Wingless dove Wingless dove
13.
The last horse on earth walks out across the range He ain't got no sadd-le! He ain't got no name! The last horse on earth walks out across the range he ain't got no saddle he ain't got no name The last horse on earth goes where he wants to go doesn't need to gallop He just walks real slow. The last horse on earth walks out across the range He ain't got no sadd-le! He ain't got no name! The last horse on earth recalls the Pleistocene before the whip and bridle before the cavalry. The last horse on earth Acts like he owns the place Can't find a single member Of the human race. The last horse on earth walks out across the range He ain't got no sadd-le! He ain't got no name! The last horse on earth enjoys the solitude And yet he hears the echo Of the multitude.

about

A musical bestiary for modern times.

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released April 26, 2020

Produced by Cary Kirk at Moss Piglet studios in Moss Beach, California
Mastered by Myles Boisen at Headless Buddha in Oakland, California
Artwork by Leighton Kelly
Download includes Harry Smith liner notes

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Kirk's Dik Dik Moss Beach, California

What started as a tuba/mandolin garage jam session quickly mutated into the full-blown tuba/guitar rock experience you now behold. Named after the world's smallest antelope, Bay Area music scene veterans, Kirk Lombard and Cary Kirk (Rube Waddell, Kemo Sabe), conflated their names into the mighty Kirk's Dik Dik. Don't let the size of the Madoqua fool you. There's nothing subtle about this Dik Dik ... more

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